I woke up at 8:30 in the morning on the 4th having contractions again. These were stronger, and 8 minutes apart for most of the day. In the evening, they started getting really strong, and were getting much closer together, so I knew it was the real thing this time. The day before had just been a warm up!
I am sure that you all don’t want to read the full story of going to the hospital and being in labor and such, so I’ll just give you the short version. We went to the hospital at 11PM because my contractions were 5 minutes apart and had been for long enough that the nurse wanted me to come in and be check out. I wasn’t dilated enough to be admitted, even after walking for an hour around the hospital, so they told me I had to go home. By this point the contractions were painful enough to bring tears, so I was highly upset about them sending me home. We got home around 12:30 in the morning. At 2:15, my water broke, and we headed back in. I asked for an epidural, because I was hurting so bad. At 6:00 they checked me and I was 5 cm dilated. At 8:00 they checked me and I was fully dilated. Holy moly! That was fast…Thank goodness I had an epidural…that would have been VERY painful otherwise.
To cut an already long story shorter, after 3 hours of pushing, my doctor took away my epidural AND gave me pitocin to speed things along. I was making progress before that, but he felt that I would be able to push more effectively if I could “feel that pressure, and feel the contractions.” Well, he was right. Less than half an hour after he took that epidural away, Briana was moving further down every time I pushed. She was finally born at 2:19PM, and she was absolutely perfect and beautiful. I forgot all the pain and effort as soon as they put her in my arms, and all I could say was “You’re so beautiful!”
Miss Briana Jane Marie was 7 pounds 8 ounces and 20.5 inches long.
I cannot believe that she is a week old already. It’s amazing how quickly one’s life can change. My entire life is based around the needs of this one tiny little person who captured my heart in her little hands the very first moment her eyes met mine. Things I was worried about seem so silly now, and things I wasn’t worried about (i.e. hadn’t thought about) now worry me a lot! And being a new mom is such an emotional experience.
Just in the past week, I have been exhausted and energized, ecstatic and worried, frustrated and encouraged, had exhausting crying jags and some really good sleep, felt incredibly proud of my baby girl, proud of my husband, proud of myself. I’ve been overwhelmed by joy and love when singing a lullaby to Briana, and overwhelmed when I think about the sheer responsibility of being a parent. Knowing how to laugh at myself when I do something silly has been helpful…Like the time I took her dirty diaper away without having her fresh diaper ready, and she peed all over the changing pad and I had to change her clothes, and change the cover on the changing pad.
I’m sure I will make many more mistakes as time goes on, but I’m also sure I’m doing my best and that is all I can do.
I meant to write a lot more, but I am nodding off here at my keyboard. New mommyhood is exhausting.