Feeling more than a little bit frustrated…

Published November 15, 2012 by jessicalynndunning

It seems like one day, Briana has breastfeeding all figured out. She settles in like a pro, and eats for about ten or twelve minutes on each breast, and then she falls asleep, I change her diaper, and she sleeps for two or three hours or so, and then we repeat. And then we have nights (or days) like last night, where she wakes up hungry and then it takes three hours to get her to settle in and eat. By the time she is finally done, I’m in tears, she is exhausted from all the screaming she has been doing, and I am just “so done” with breastfeeding that it isn’t even funny.

Is this normal with newborns? Why is she so easy to feed one day, and so difficult the next? Last night, she would latch on, suckle for like a minute, and then pull away and shriek at the top of her lungs. I would say maybe it was something I ate, but I hadn’t eaten anything that I haven’t eaten before with her, and she never had a problem with it. So after she would pull away, I would try again, and she would do the same thing. I finally got up and tried rocking her, checked her diaper again, sang to her, tried putting her back in her bassinet, let David hold her, tried burping her…but she was still making hungry faces and noises. So I tried feeding her again with the same results.

I was so frustrated, I had to give the baby to David and tell him to leave the room with her. I felt so helpless. I felt like I should know what to do, and I didn’t, and she wouldn’t stop crying. She kept looking at me with this sad little face in between cries, like “Why don’t you just give me what I want, mom?” It made my heart sad.

After last night, I’m just about ready to give up on breastfeeding completely. It took three hours for her to settle in and eat, and as soon as she did, she fell straight to sleep! *sigh* I wonder if I just pumped my milk and gave it to her in a bottle if there is any difference…I’ll ask her pediatrician at her appointment tomorrow if there are any added health benefits to the actual act of breastfeeding, as opposed to her receiving the breast milk from a bottle. Everyone keeps saying to “give it a month” and by then everything is much easier…but it’s been nearly two weeks, and I don’t know how many nights like last night I can handle. If I can get this frustrated after only two weeks, I don’t know if I want to stay with it for a full month.
Frustrated New Mommy

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2 comments on “Feeling more than a little bit frustrated…

  • Don’t give in just yet. Sometimes when they’re tired they don’t suckle as hard. Did you try massaging your breast to see if you could get the milk to come out some? With Nicholas if I could get a little to pool on his tongue, it seemed to wake him up and make him want it more. Also, she may not have been in a comfortable position. I used to have to nurse Nicholas skin to skin. If he had clothes on he would scream and fidgit and just be unhappy. The second I stripped him down and laid him against me, he would settle and nurse.
    Just things to try. I know it’s hard, but it IS beneficial to mom and baby because it creates a deep bond. She will always remember your smell and the comforting feeling of your arms.
    ❤ you sweetie!

  • I have no advice for this, as I stopped breastfeeding once I left the hospital. But I did want to say, hang in there mama. You did right by giving her to David to catch a break.

    I remember when Cailyn had colic and I felt so helpless too. It’s so frustrating and heartbreaking when you can’t seem to soothe them and give them what they need. I think we have all been there at one time or another.

    You are doing great and I am hoping for a better night for you. 🙂

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