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Mid-Move Blog Post

Published October 3, 2013 by JD61088

You know, when I was a kid, I liked moving. I liked packing up all my stuff in boxes labeled “books” or “toys” or “journals.” Of course, when I was a kid, my room was the only room that I was responsible for packing. It’s much less fun when you are expected to pack up everything in the apartment. It doesn’t help that we have moved…7 times in the last 6 years. Seriously! This is the SEVENTH time we’ve moved! Ugh. When we get our own place in the next 8 months or so, I am going to make sure we get a place that we can stay for a least three or four years. I am so sick of moving!

We haven’t really been able to settle in yet. There was a miscommunication about when we would be moving in…I said “We’ll start moving in on the first, and I want to be done by the fifth.” My in-laws heard “We’ll move in on the fifth.” So they didn’t really have anything ready in our room when we started bringing stuff over. So right now we’re sort of stuck waiting until they have time to put the new shelves out in the garage and get things organized. It’s a little bit of a bummer because I had yesterday and today off work and was hoping to get the bulk of the move done this week. Hopefully by my days off next week, they’ll be all set,and we can get down to it and get it done.

Briana is handling the whole thing like a champ. I don’t think she really gets what is going on, but we’ve managed not to disrupt her routine, so she’s perfectly happy. She’s loving all the extra space to move and crawl and explore…she finds about ten new things a day that we don’t want her getting into…we need to baby proof everything.

My sister-in-law and I took her with us when we took the dog for a walk today. Briana sat up on my shoulders, all bundled up against the fall chill and looking absolutely adorable!

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It wasn’t a very long walk, but that’s okay. Bri loves to be outside anyway.

I can’t believe that she will be 11 months old in just two days! And then she’s just one month away from her first birthday! My goodness! Where has the time gone?

I’ll try to do a more complete update about Bri on the 5th. Right now it’s dinner time for me…I haven’t eaten much today, Bri has kept me busy!

Busy New Mama

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Briana: Destructo Girl in Disguise

Published September 22, 2013 by JD61088

Is it possible for a baby to reach “Destructive Toddler” status before she has taken her first independent steps? If so, Briana is most definitely there!

I woke up this morning to find that David had dozed off on the couch while watching Briana. I can only assume that’s what happened, because the pile of neatly folded clothes I had left on the couch was strewn all over the floor, the diapers had all been pulled out of the Pampers bag and thrown everywhere, the Playstation controller was covered in drool, her toy bin was upside down (the contents, of course, all over the floor), and the blinds on the sliding glass door were all askew. Quite the little hurricane, my daughter is! πŸ™‚

Setting aside her destructive tendencies (and we all know it’s really exploring and curiosity anyway), I am quite proud of my little munchkin. Her favorite phrase right now is “uh oh” and she says it all the time! With many different meanings. πŸ™‚ “Uh oh” in a questioning tone when she purposefully drops her toy over the side of her car seat, “uh oh” in a firm tone as she knocks over her blocks, “uh oh” said in an actual “uh oh” tone when she knows she’s in trouble for pulling on the blinds or pushing the buttons on Daddy’s PS3 (this kid is GREAT at ejecting DVDs and Blu-Rays), and “uh oh” said in a tone of delight when my in-laws dog sniffs at her toes.

Her vocabulary is small, but I feel like she is really catching on to the rhythm and flow of speech. You can really tell when she is curious about something, because you can hear the questioning note in her “babbling.” And if she’s showing you something, even though it’s a string of random sounds, I swear it’s like she’s telling you about what she’s holding out in front of her. “See mom, this is what this is!” Her exclamations of excitement when she sees the dog have a definite “Look at that mom!!!” sound to them. And she definitely knows what an angry tone is. She doesn’t just immediately dissolve into tears or wailing every time she’s upset now. She screws up her face and frowns and sternly babbles at me. “Deh deh deh DA! Da da da deh deh DA!” Not every time, but sometimes. It makes me laugh.

She loves pushing buttons right now, on remotes or controllers or toys or pretty much anything. She has also discovered that doors are fascinating because they swing/move back and forth. Every time I am holding her and I walk through a doorway, I have to be careful she doesn’t jerk me up short by grabbing onto the door and holding on as tight as she can. She likes to grab the edge of the door and push it and pull it to watch it swing.

She’s eating more “real” food now, and fewer baby purees. Pasta and cheese and chicken and veggies…things that are easy for her to pick up. I got her a “My First Plate Set” at Walmart the other day. It came with a little baby safe fork and spoon. Too cute! She ate her pasta and veggies out of it last night…of course she was eating with her fingers, but she enjoyed chewing on her fork and spoon. πŸ™‚ She has mastered the sippy cup, as well, and will drink from a regular cup if you hold it for her. I have been too afraid to try just handing her a regular cup…she likes to throw things right now, and I don’t think that handing her a grenade filled with liquid would be a good parenting decision!

Briana still isn’t quite walking on her own, but she is needing less and less help every day. The other day she was holding onto just one of my hands and she stood up and took two tiny steps. She loves walking in between David and I, holding onto each of our hands and just going as fast as her little legs can carry her. I think once she realizes she doesn’t need us for balance, we’re going to be doing a lot of running to catch up!

She has figured out how to crawl up onto the couch. I seriously watched her the other day use a stuffed toy as a stepping stool to get herself up easier. Um, excuse me? Slow down a little bit, baby, I’m not ready for this yet! She’s also discovered what fun laundry baskets and empty toy bins are…though I took the laundry basket away after she was sitting in it and it tipped over and she hit her face on the base of the lamp. I felt SO terrible…she still has a mark under her poor little nose.

I’m sure that I’m forgetting a ton of stuff and will think of it later, but this is what currently comes to mind. She is turning one soon! Can you believe it?! I can’t. I’ve been thinking a lot about the day she was born in the last few days. When they took her and put her on my chest that first time, how happy and overwhelmed with love I was. And I look at her now and how much she has grown and changed and…it’s just incredible!

Just a heads up, when she turns one, I’m starting a new blog. I’ve already come up with a name for it and reserved the url, aren’t you proud of me? I used it as a blog title a while back and just really loved it! “Mommyhood in Motion.” What do you think? I haven’t posted anything there yet, but the url is http://mommyhoodinmotion.wordpress.com/ and I plan on starting to blog there instead of here ON her birthday. I am hoping everyone follows me over there! I explained before, but just in case you missed it, I feel like my “new mommy” days are kind of coming to an end. And also, we plan on having more kids…so blogging under the url “brianasmommy.wordpress.com” wouldn’t really work out once that happened! You should all go follow the blog now! That way you won’t miss anything when I do the switch in November. πŸ™‚ Hope to see you over there, too!

Still a New Mommy for a Little While Longer

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Miserable Mommy?

Published September 14, 2013 by JD61088

I went back to work on May 24th after blessedly being able to stay home for six plus months with my baby girl after she was born. So it’s been nearly four months since I went back. The first day was heart wrenching, the first week was torture, the second week was hard. I figured that I would get used to it as time went on – leaving Bri at home and heading off to make money. I mean, mothers (and fathers) do this all the time, right?

And I suppose it has gotten a little easier. I mean, I don’t cry every day now…I manage to hold the tears back. It’s only once a week or so that I let them come. When people at work ask me how I handled coming back to work with a baby at home (which a lot of customers seem to feel is their business when it comes up that I have a ten month old daughter), I literally choke up and have a hard time answering without my voice breaking.

Please don’t snicker and roll your eyes. I’m an emotional person, but that doesn’t make me stupid, right? I mean, I cannot possibly be the only mama out there who has to work and wishes with all her heart that she could be a SAHM!

I loved being home with my baby and not missing a single moment. I loved being there to wipe away every tear and respond to every smile and belly laugh, to watch as she explored this great big world where everything is new and fascinating! And while I still get to spend a large chunk of the day with her, I’m not there in the afternoons. I’m not there for dinner or bath time. And dammit, I’m not there for bedtime. Bedtime is so special to me.

Bedtime is special because when I was home every night, that was our special time. Daddy and Uncle AJ would head off to their respective bedrooms and go to sleep, and Bri and I would cuddle on the couch because she just wasn’t ready to sleep yet. Our little night owl would stay awake so late! But this mama is a natural night owl, too. So we’d snuggle, and I might watch a show or read a book (out loud, so she could enjoy it, too), or maybe we’d just sit there and take each other in. And when she got a little older, and she started to go to sleep earlier, I was still the one who put her to bed, because that was our time.

It seems silly sometimes, given that I was with her all day, and David was at work…you’d think that bedtime would be his, but somehow it became mine, and I cherished every moment. Even the “rough” nights when she fought sleep like it was her mortal enemy, when I occasionally lost my patience and had to call in backup (David, lol), I was almost always the one who finished out the bedtime ritual and put her in her sleeper and later her crib. We had a ritual, and then I went back to work and I lost that, and it really kind of hurts. And now, on the nights that I am home from work for bedtime, I somehow always miss out on putting her to bed. She and David have their own routine now, since it’s him five days out of seven, so when I try, she gets riled up and won’t sleep. I know I keep harping on it, but it’s heartbreaking. I miss our special time together.

As a working mom, I still get to see a lot of moments and cherish a lot of laughs and silliness and discovery and fun. But I miss a lot, too. I miss it because I’m not there. She’ll only be this little for such a little while. And in just four short years, she’ll be in school, and I’ll have to let her go and discover things without me, and let her tell me about them later when she comes home.

But in the here and now, everything in me is telling me that I should be at home with her, cherishing it all every second of the day. And I can’t.

 

I’ve been talking to David about trying to find a position as a nanny or before/after school care babysitter type person. A few people had suggested it before when I needed to go back to work, but I didn’t think I could find anything quick enough (that would bring in enough money for us to pay our bills) before we’d be really in a tough spot, so I went with the quickest solution and went back to my old job (though at a different location). Now, I have a job, and I have money coming in, so I can take the time I need to try to find a nanny or babysitting position. If I find the right one, with enough hours, I can still bring in enough income that we can survive, and I can bring Bri with me to “work.” I didn’t think David would go for it, as he kind of hemmed and hawed about it before I went back to work, acting like he wasn’t sure how he felt about it. But he has been surprisingly supportive. When I told him how heartbroken I was every time I had to leave her, and how I literally cried all the way to work some days, he didn’t hesitate to tell me he would support me in whatever I wanted to do. (Though, of course, he did point out that “whatever I wanted to do” did not mean I could give up working entirely, because we do need an income from me to pay our bills.)

I’m feeling excited and hopeful, but also nervous. Taking care of other people’s kids is something I’ve done before, babysitting and such, but I wasn’t a parent then, and I didn’t realize how important a job it was. Does that make any sense at all? Ha! Sometimes I feel ridiculous.

Anyway, my long-winded rambling (oh, woe is me) has probably scared off the majority of my readers tonight. I just felt like this decision was important, and I wanted to share it. *shrug* Maybe it’s only important to me. But since this is my blog, you’ll have to pretend it’s important…or quit reading it! πŸ™‚

In Disney World

Published September 1, 2013 by JD61088

I am writing to you from Florida. I was going to say “sunny Florida” but it was pouring down rain when we got here. We’re talking buckets…they stopped delivering luggage to the terminals because of “extreme weather.”

I am on a Disney World vacation with my little family this week. “Why are you blogging then?” I can HEAR you roll your eyes from here.

I am blogging because it is 1:34 in the morning (FL time) and my husband and daughter are sound asleep. And while I wish I was also asleep because I am exhausted, I drank two Cokes with dinner in an attempt to rid myself of a headache from you know where, and now I can’t sleep. Such is life.

I thought I would blog about getting here. New parents worry about getting places. I was dreading the trip today. Security with a stroller and a baby and four carry on bags (two for baby) and one car seat bag (just in case there wasn’t room for her seat on the plane)…it wasn’t something any sane person would be looking forward to.

My in-laws came with us in our van this morning so that we wouldn’t have to load our car, unload our car, load their car, and then unload their car. Less steps equals happiness when you’re a parent. (Plus, they drove our van home for us and we didn’t have to pay for parking…score!)

I was a nervous wreck this morning. I was so afraid we would forget something (we forgot something) or put something in our carry on that wasn’t allowed (I will get to this later), that I was a serious basket case.

We made it to the airport on time and my father in law and husband loaded our plethora of junk on a luggage cart, and we did the whole bag drop thing. (Which still left us with a stroller, carseat in carseat bag which also contained diapers and wipes for the trip, two duffel bags, a backpack, and a diaper bag…not to mention the baby…)

My in-laws couldn’t go past security so we got in line ourselves…duffel bags piled on stroller, David with carseat bag on his back, me with diaper bag and baby, backpack underneath stroller.

I was sweating and feeling panicky. I could tell David was nervous too. We piled all our junk up there and the TSA guy was so kind and helpful. We had to take our liquids out, and declare the formula and baby food for Briana, and also put all the formula and baby food in a separate bin so it could undergo “additional screening and testing.” But he was so nice and patient and took us through it step by step. And since there is a Family Line at security, everyone behind us was being patient, too.

So I took out all the baby food that I remembered packing in the carry on luggage and followed instructions. They took the formula over and did some test on it and brought it back an said we were good to go. I started putting everything back together and putting the baby food away (which had been cleared). I had packed an entire four pack of baby yogurt in the bag, and it was cleared.

Meanwhile, another TSA agent came over and stated that he needed to do additional screening on our backpack. I thought it might be because of something called MagicBands in our bag which are basically wristwatch looking things that are in beta for Disney park tickets. Anyway, they were in a box and all contain chips of some kind so I thought that was it.

The guy eventually brought the bag back over looking perplexed and apologetic at the same time, holding a single container of baby yogurt in his hand. “Well, this is over the three ounce limit, but it’s baby food…but I can’t test it without opening it…so…”

I was not going to tell this guy that I had already been cleared for four additional containers of baby yogurt that was already put away. And I wasn’t going to cause a holdup or start an argument over a container of yogurt I hadn’t even remembered packing. So I just told him to throw it away. “Are you sure?”

Well, man, you aren’t going to let me take it through…what else was I supposed to do with it, mail it home? “Yes, I’m sure, it’s not a big deal.”

So, disaster averted, violation of personal space complete, let’s find our gate!

And we did find our gate. And we found the only available seating which happened to be in a row behind someone who was stretched across an entire row of seats napping. Briana needed a diaper, so I opened her diaper bag to get what we needed. Her diaper bag has Velcro.

The man sleeping apparently woke up (I was kneeling on the floor and didn’t notice) and after David walked away to change Briana’s diaper, this guy made a huge deal about stretching and yawning and making “Oh I just woke up” sounds. I glanced at him and just kept organizing our stuff, since we needed to gate check the stroller and I needed to find out if we could take our carseat on the plane for Bri or not.

The guy called me a bitch. Wasn’t brave enough to say it to my face, and said it just quiet enough that if I said anything to him he could pretend he hadn’t said it or hadn’t meant for me to hear.

And notice he waited until my husband walked away? REAL brave, dude. Real brave.

Of course, in the moment, I didn’t say anything because I didn’t feel safe saying anything. I was half afraid that if I did say something and it escalated, neither one of us would be allowed to board our flight. I considered talking to a flight attendant or something because it made me extremely uncomfortable, but that felt like tattling and I doubted they would do anything.

So I let it pass. I told David what happened once we were on the plane and he was FURIOUS, but we both agreed not to rock the boat.

Of course, halfway through the flight I started thinking about what happened and I was absolutely furious. And I knew EXACTLY what I should have said to him! Ugh. I know I am not the only one this happens to…but it is still insanely aggravating.

Anyway that whole story was off topic.

I did find out there was room for Briana’s seat, and we boarded and got all set up during the early boarding process.

I was armed with tons of tips from my aunt and uncle and many others about traveling on a plane with a baby. I had a bottle ready for her to suck on during our takeoff (helps with ears popping and such), I had a bunch of brand new never before seen toys for her to play with, and snacks and bottles galore for her to eat. I had blankets and burp rags and wipes and diapers and everything else I could possibly think of to entertain, comfort, or mollify my child.

She was an angel. She played in her seat for quite a while. She took a nap and then ate and played some more. We hit some pretty bad turbulence so we put her back in her seat and she was fine with that…she took another nap. She loved her new toys and smiled at everyone who walked by. She let us change her diaper in our laps three times when the seatbelt light was on without a fuss.

She was such a good little girl!

She gave a high five (newly learned skill) to the flight attendant who brought by her official Wings (since it was her first flight) and flirted outrageously with the woman across the aisle from us. Such a cutie.

Without my aunts advice, the flight would have been a nightmare…with it, it was the same as flying without a baby. Actually, better for me. I used to have anxiety up in airplanes, especially if I had to sit anywhere other than the aisle seat. Claustrophobia is no fun. Today, I sat in the middle seat on a five and a half hour flight and felt no anxiety at all…well, except during the thunder storm turbulence, but that wasn’t really related to my claustrophobia!

If you’re a new mom or just parents going on their first flight with an infant, my aunt (and uncle, lol) tips are as follows:

If you aren’t buying a seat for your baby but want to try to have a seat available for her, book a window and an aisle seat…the middle seat is almost always the last to be booked.

Bring brand new toys to keep baby’s interest.

Give a bottle or sippy cup during take off and landing. It helps with the change in pressure. Briana didn’t fuss at all either time.

Bring two changes of clothes for your baby, and a change of clothes for yourself…”wearing a poopy shirt for five hours is no fun.” Bring large ziploc bags for messy clothes.

Bring food for three more hours than you think you need (same goes for bottles).

If you are checking a carseat, stuff your diapers (the ones you aren’t using on the plane) in the carseat bag…they don’t charge for the carseats or strollers that are checked!

Bring Lysol or Clorox antibacterial wipes and wipe down every surface on your row that baby might touch or chew on. (I forgot to do this today, shame on me.)

I am sure I am leaving some tips out, but those are the ones that came in super handy today. My aunt and uncle are awesome people with awesome advice.

That’s all I got folks. Hopefully I can get some sleep now!

Mommyhood in Motion

Published July 31, 2013 by JD61088

My daughter is going through a clingy stage. When I am holding her, she clings to me like I’m going to give her away. She grabs little fistfuls of whatever is handy…my shirt, my hair, my skin…and she holds on for dear life.

As far as I can tell, it’s just with me. She cries when I leave the room. She cries when I set her down. She cries when I put her in the car seat (which is something new, as she’s always been pretty easy with getting into and out of the car seat). She screams if I walk from the living room (where she spends the majority of her time) to the kitchen (which is five feet away) without making sure she comes with me.

I love Briana…but I hope that this stage passes quickly.

I don’t mind holding her, and I love that she wants to spend time with me. But I can’t eat without her wanting into my lap or crawling up my leg, and I can’t take three seconds to shoot off a text without her trying to grab my phone or screaming because I’m not holding her. She doesn’t do this to David, mind you, it’s just me!

Does it make me a bad mom that today I was basically telling David to keep her away from me, so I could have five minutes of non-squirmy-wiggly-wants-my-attention-baby time?

It’s mentally exhausting, not to mention physically. She’s no newborn anymore! She’s heavy! And long. And squirmy. It’s like wrestling a bag of snakes. A 20 plus pound bag. Of angry snakes. Who wiggle. A lot.

Anyway. She’s a clingy wiggly little girl right now. Aside from that she’s dandy.

She has learned to clap. She says “mama” and “dada.” She says “ba-ba” when she wants a bottle and she says “hi”…sometimes…if she feels like it. She’s learning to wave at people, but is shy about waving to anyone other than mommy or daddy right now.

Bri likes to throw things right now. Especially noisy things. She picks up a noisy toy, bangs it on the floor (or couch) and then throws it on the floor. Then she bends down and picks it up and repeats the process. It’s very cute! And noisy. Did I say noisy already?

She has gotten quite vocal in the past couple of weeks. She’s always been vocal, but it’s constant babbling now, in her own personal made-up language. I hear that’s precursor to starting to talk, and I swear I’m hearing real words mixed up in there sometimes, but she babbles so constantly that I can’t always catch and identify it in time to make a big deal out of it and encourage her to use the word again.

Another way she has gotten vocal is to scream, very loudly, any time you take anything away that she wants. Especially mommy or daddy’s keys. That’s a big deal, apparently. So I’ve learned that if I have to leave the house, drive, get the mail, or anything else that requires keys in the next six hours or so, it’s a good idea to hide the keys from the baby. Otherwise, it’s a capital offense.

For a few weeks, Briana was chowing down on solid food. She was seriously eating (pretty much) four full servings of food at each sitting, three times a day…Well, three at breakfast. Cereal, fruit, and yogurt at breakfast, then a meat, veggie, fruit, and yogurt for lunch and dinner. She wasn’t gaining a huge amount of weight, so I just figured she was about to have a growth spurt or that she had a fast metabolism or something.

In the last few days, however, that’s changed. She eats maybe two full containers, combined, of the same mix. (Cereal, fruit, yogurt for breakfast, some sort of meat, veggie, fruit, yogurt for lunch and dinner.) It’s a big reduction in her food intake, and I was worried at first, but she is still eating all her bottles, so maybe she is just done with her growth spurt or whatever it was that was requiring her to eat a four course meal for every meal? I’m going to mention it to her doctor on Monday, but at this point I’m honestlyΒ  not really concerned. It could even be that we’re just paying more attention to her cues, and realizing she is full and/or done with what we’re offering, whereas before we weren’t paying attention? I don’t know. Either way, she’s eating way less solid food now.

Briana likes Ritz crackers and cheerios. And apple juice. Let’s not forget the apple juice. We’re only giving her a tiny bit at a time, to encourage her to learn how to use her sippy cup. I’ve tried giving her formula in a sippy cup with no luck. I’d really like her to be done with bottles sooner rather than later (like on or before her first birthday, really). Does anyone have any tips? (Again, I’ll be asking her doctor on Monday at her nine month check up, but it never hurts to get an opinion from the general public either.)

I think Briana is going to walk soon. She really only holds onto the furniture very lightly now, for balance, and I’ve seen her stand unsupported for a second or two at a time, almost like she doesn’t realize she’s doing it. She’s reaching from one piece of the furniture to another and “transferring” to that other piece as well, turning almost all the way around to do it. I’m not saying she’s going to walk tomorrow, but I do think she’ll probably walk before her first birthday.

It amazes me that 9 months ago, she was a precious little bundle in a pink swaddling blanket who couldn’t even roll all the way over. How quickly our babies grow and learn!

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Briana grew out of her infant carrier. Finally! (I say finally because everyone warned us that infant carriers were a “waste of money” because we would only get about 3 months of use out of it.” Considering Briana turns 9 months in five days, and we just now had to buy a new seat, I’d say we did considerably better than people were saying we would.

I was hoping to buy a really nice Graco brand model that I had found online, but Briana kind of snuck up on the weight limit without me noticing it, and I weighed her and panicked because she needed a new seat now. Since I didn’t have $300 lying around to buy the one I wanted, I had to go and shop around a bit and see what I could find. I ended up buying a Safety First Alpha 65 model. I talked to the employee at the store about all the different models and which ones were best, and which ones to avoid. I would have loved to get a Britax seat, but the price was again, out of my range.

I wasn’t thrilled (at first) with my choice, but that was purely based on the fact it wasn’t the one I had originally chosen. I tend to choose something and then get stuck on it, even if I find one that works just as well. Once I got it home and started playing with it and working with it and adjusting the straps and such, I realized it’s actually easier to use than the model I had originally chosen…and just as safe!

We installed it today. We let Bri test it in the living room first.

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Doesn’t she just look adorable? Anyway, that’s the seat. I actually really like it. And the pattern reminds me of fireworks, which is cute! And it’s a 3 in 1. So I can keep her rear-facing up to 40 pounds, and then forward facing up to 65 pounds. And then it changes into a seatbelt positioning booster seat, and can be used up to 100 pounds or until she gets too tall for it (or until she can safely sit in the seat without it)!

We still need to buy a seat for David’s car, which will probably end up being the seat that get’s left with babysitters and family and such when we drop her off somewhere, because there is no way I’m taking my car seat in and out every day when I go to work. It’s easy to install, but not that easy, and there’s no way I can do it while juggling Briana. So we need at least one more seat.
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We’ll probably go with a Cosco or a cheaper version of what we already have. The person I spoke with at the store assured me (or rather reassured me, since I already knew) that all car seats are subject to the same federal regulations, and that while some models (like Britax) go above and beyond, even the 50 dollar seats will keep my precious baby girl safe in the horrible event that we get into a car crash with her in the car.
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Honestly, I’m hoping to make it back into the store tomorrow to just buy the same exact model…it’s on sale right now – $30 off! Woot. A steal.
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This blog is getting a bit long. I only mentioned the car seat at all because I wanted to share that it was sort of sad, taking her infant car seat base out of the car and installing her “big girl” car seat. It was concrete proof that Briana really is growing and changing with every passing moment, and I’ll never get those days back. And while David and I plan on having more children, I will never again be a “first time mom.”
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Maybe I’m making a big deal out of nothing, but putting the larger seat in the car felt like a big moment in my Mommy Journey. Briana is turning 9 months old on Monday, and then it will only be three months until she is a year old.
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I was planning on writing this blog until she was a year old, and then changing the name or starting a new blog, since obviously I won’t really be able to claim “new mom” status after my baby turns a year old. Plus, in the future, when I have more babies, having a blog with the url “brianasmommy.wordpress.com” may upset my future youngins. πŸ™‚
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Anyway. My point is…life is ever changing and passing by unbelievably fast. I’m going to have to work hard to keep up.
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Relishing my Quickly Passing “New Mom” Status

Patience? What’s that?

Published July 11, 2013 by JD61088

I have never been a very patient person. This is true in pretty much every facet of my life….at work (people unload their carts too slowly), while driving (um, hello? You’re driving five under the speed limit!), even trying to understand stuff while I was in school (why can’t I just get it?). I am impatient.

With Briana, I have learned patience. And it has helped me enormously when trying to get her to eat or waiting for her to sleep for a nap, or struggling to do a diaper change on a wiggly little monster baby who knows just when to twist away from me to make things the most difficult. It’s even helped me during playtime with her.

But at night, when she wakes up, there’s a limit. I am extraordinarily patient for the first half hour. I am patient for the second half hour. I am holding onto my patience by the skin of my teeth for the half hour after that. But, almost uniformly, if she hits two hours of wakefulness in the middle of the night, I lose it…quickly.

It isn’t a fun feeling. Longing for sleep and knowing she will be awake again at six in the morning no matter what…having her almost asleep and having her eyes shoot open for no reason whatsoever. Having her asleep six different times but having her wake up as soon as you shift or try to set her down.

I realize this is at least partially my fault for rocking her to sleep. But that worked for us, for seven months. I don’t know why the last month has been so difficult. I know we need to transition into another routine for bed, but I am not here at night and can’t force my husband to follow the routine I have suggested numerous times. I have two nights a week when I am home for bedtime…all other nights she is asleep when I get home…at least initially.

Tonight, she woke at midnight as I was getting ready to go to sleep. I picked her up and relished the extra time I got to snuggle her before bed. I rocked her, and had her almost asleep again when David walked in to go to bed and she woke up ready to play.

*sigh*

At two, I put her in her crib and walked out because, like clockwork, after two long hours of rocking and holding and swaying and PATIENCE, I needed to put her down because I was starting to freak out. When it reaches that point, it’s time for a break.

I walked out of the bedroom and closed the bedroom door. I walked into the living room and sat on the couch. I started breathing deeply and counting my breaths…in for ten, hold for five, out for ten. I heard David get up and I heard him shushing her. I stayed away. I will have my patience back in the morning, but for now, it’s hiding from me. And an impatient mom won’t do Briana any good.

I don’t really understand why two hours seems to be my mental limit. I wonder if I didn’t have a clock if it would be the same, or if it is the knowledge that I have spent two hours trying to get her to sleep that makes me impatient. A question for another day.

Bri is asleep now, so it’s safe to head in to bed.

A (Working on being more) Patient Mommy

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Cribs and Naps and Screaming, Oh My!

Published March 23, 2013 by JD61088

Since Briana was about three or four weeks old, she has been sleeping in her Fisher Price Rock ‘n Play Sleeper. We tried a bassinet first, and it just didn’t work. She woke up every few minutes crying. In desperation one night, I put her in the sleeper, figuring that since it cradled her, she would sleep better. Voila! It worked. 7-10 hours of solid sleep every night. Now that is coming back to bite me.

We are trying to transition her to sleeping in her crib. She hasn’t hit the weight limit on the sleeper yet (she still has at least 10 pounds to go before that happens), but she is getting really close to being able to pull herself into a sitting position in it, and I’m afraid that even with the safety straps, it just isn’t going to be okay for her sleep in it for much longer. The problem is, she is used to sleeping in a slightly inclined position, in a sleeper that cradles her. Obviously, the crib doesn’t do either one for her, and she gets quite (vocally) ticked off at me when I try to make her sleep in it.

It took a week (or so), but I finally having her take her midday nap in the. Sort of. Her nap used to be at least an hour, sometimes an hour and a half or even two hours. Now it only lasts from 30-45 minutes, but it’s a start, and I’m not going to jinx it by complaining. (Even though she is a grumpy little bugger lately from lack of a “proper” nap. It’s still progress!) I’ve only tried to put her in there at night twice, because I really don’t like having her in the other room. Call me a sucker if you want, but the crib is moving to our bedroom tomorrow (Saturday), and then I’ll feel so much better about it (which means I can be consistent).

Another problem of my own creation is that she won’t fall asleep unless someone is holding her, and usually that someone better have a bottle in hand. Once you finally get her to sleep, you have to get her into bed without waking her up! This is a habit she picked up when we were desperate for her to fall asleep any way we could get her to fall asleep. *sigh* The bad routines that I get myself into!

Tonight, she fell asleep in David’s lap and woke up as I was putting her in her sleeper. Instead of picking her up, I buckled her safety straps, kissed her face, and walked away. She started “singing.” That’s what David and I call it when she is making noise continuously, but she’s just making noise to self-soothe. It was so soft and cute. We could hear her in the living room, and David went to check on her twice. The second time he came back and laughingly told me that she fell asleep in the middle of her song. “Eh eh eh eh eh snooooze.” πŸ™‚ So that’s progress, too.

I’m celebrating small victories this week, because it has been really rough. Since she isn’t sleeping as much during the day, Briana has been especially clingy and needy. And vocal in her displeasure. Today she screamed. And screamed. And screamed. It wasn’t crying, it was full on shrieking. I could tell she was just tired, but she had hit that point where she was too tired and upset to sleep, even though I had been trying to get her to sleep for two or three hours and she had been fighting it. I was in tears by the end of it, but she finally conked out in my lap. I was too worn out to try to put her in her crib, so I wimped out and let her sleep on my shoulder. Today was one of those days where at one point I had to put her in her crib and close her bedroom door and just walk away for twenty minutes. Taking care of a shrieking infant when you have a migraine is not my idea of fun. 😦

Briana also still hasn’t gotten over her “Oh my gosh I don’t know you” syndrome (AKA Stranger Danger as discussed in my last blog). I’ve been trying to let other people hold her even after she starts to get upset, but as my sister in law said a few weeks back “I don’t hold crying things that aren’t mine.” πŸ™‚ Let’s face it: who really wants to hold an infant who starts screaming and crying the moment they realize that it’s not mom or dad holding them? It’s continuous…It doesn’t even let up after a few minutes. My dad and I tried yesterday. I handed him the baby and walked away to another room so she couldn’t see me. I think it was probably five minutes? She screamed the whole time. It broke my heart, and I think his, too, because he finally called me back in and told me to give her a hug and tell her everything was okay.

Any tips on helping her get over this? I know I need to let people hold her, and I do, but once she starts shrieking and freaking out, people hand her back to me because they don’t WANT to hold her…and I can’t blame them. That girl has a set of lungs on her!

 

Still a New Mommy

(Having Many Sleep-Time MISadventures)

 

 

Briana’s First Trip To The Park

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